Mother Mary's Garden, My Journey to the Path

My Journey to the Path

By John Revels, August 2006

I thought I would put this together to help anyone who may find they come from a similar road. My hope is that it helps you to find your path and not become a block that impedes you from finding it. Please be aware that we all have our individual paths. Though some paths seem similar, they are actually as unique as we are unique individuals. So read this with an attitude of, if he could do it, I can do it.

One day, driving home from work, I was thinking to myself, this is crazy…I am driving 100 miles a day to get a paycheck so I can pay for the house my wife and I live in, the cars we drive, the food we eat, the clothes we wear and such. Life is much more than this back and forth rat race. I thought about the Logical Song from the band Super Tramp, where they say:

"When I was young, it seemed that life was so wonderful,
a miracle, oh it was beautiful, magical.
And all the birds in the trees, well they'd be singing so happily,
joyfully, playfully watching me.
But then they send me away to teach me how to be sensible,
logical, responsible, practical.
And they showed me a world where I could be so dependable,
clinical, intellectual, cynical."

This was me. I remember being a happy kid. Playing and riding my bike. Hunting lizards and frogs and catching butterflies. Then I grew up. I was taught how to wear this personality so that I wouldn’t offend anyone and I could blend in with everyone else. This is how to be normal 101. The Logical Song continues:

"Now watch what you say or they'll be calling you a radical,
liberal, fanatical, criminal.
Won't you sign up your name, we'd like to feel you're
acceptable, respectable, presentable, a vegetable!"

I bought it hook line and sinker. After all, the ones telling me to "be normal" were older and wiser. They have to know what they are talking about, right? But deep within, I knew something was missing. I would gaze into the fireplace and search for it amongst the flames. As a kid, I would lie on the ground and look at the stars at night and wonder. Now, driving home on this fateful day, the rest of the song makes it clear;

"At night, when all the world's asleep,
the questions run so deep
for such a simple man.
Won't you please, please tell me what we've learned
I know it sounds absurd
but please tell me who I am"

It occurred to me, then, that I have no clue who I am. I believed all the programming that I have received my whole life that I should be this or that and don’t be this or that. But I still felt that wasn’t who I, the inner me, was. Thus began my quest. Now, in today’s world, when you want to know something, you go to the Internet. So that is where I started. I began searching biblical sites, but quickly got overwhelmed by the grammar. All that King James where ever art thou this and that. I never was a fan of Shakespeare and found searching this kind of text wasn’t relevant to what I needed to know. I tossed up my hands and exclaimed, "Would someone please throw a brother a bone?"

So, since I was on the Internet, I might as well go find something entertaining. After getting my fill of the various "entertainment" sites that are out there, I still felt like I wanted to keep looking, but no more Shakespeare please. My next search leads me to all those 2012 sites. You know, the Earth is going thru the 5th dimension and the Mayan calendar ends it cycle and that means big changes and such. While browsing, I saw a reference to Atlantis and that perked up my interest. So I focused on Atlantis sites. I found it encouraging to see that there were societies that were not using monetary systems. This leads me to the Venus Project. This project is a think tank aimed at reexamining our values, and to reflect upon and evaluate some of the underlying issues and assumptions we have as a society. Way cool stuff, and I could totally relate because our current system ain’t working.

I eventually found this site about Edgar Cayce, a psychic who is probably the most documented in America. Guess what? The Official Headquarters is in VA Beach. I run down there and start browsing some of his psychic readings. He has readings on everything. At first, I am interested in the Atlantis stuff, but then I keep seeing these references to the Christ Consciousness. Now I am thinking to myself, what’s that?

Back home, I start a new search on this Christ Consciousness thing. All kinds of hits. So I save some of the more interesting ones to my Favorites folder so I can go back to them later. One day, I am browsing these sites and come across AskRealJesus.com. Here is a guy (I thought he was a woman at first because his name is Kim) who is channeling the real Jesus from 2,000 years ago. Now, I was a little familiar with the channeling concept because that is what Edgar Cayce was doing, and I found his readings to be highly accurate. As I read thru the site, I found myself saying, I knew it. There were many "Ah Ha" moments. The discourses were clear and easy to understand and ranged from who are you to spiritual beings in Heaven. This was the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.

So I am a studying fool at this point. My thirst cannot be satisfied. I have asked and now I am getting in a major way. So much so that I don’t turn the TV on for days, and in the car back and forth to work, I leave the radio off so I can formulate my thoughts. I buy a few books from the website, thinking in the back of my mind, see, they just want to sell stuff. In the meantime, I noticed that they have a forum, so I log in and read thru some of the conversations. Wow. These guys are thinking the same way I am thinking, and even beyond. I see that they are going to have a Conference/Retreat in Chicago. Right away, I think I have to go to that. But, geez, it’s in Chicago. How am I going to get there? I write it down as a note to myself, then forget about it, because I’m pretty sure it won’t happen.

The books come, Save Yourself and The Master Keys to the Abundant Life. I have them delivered to the office because the last thing I need is heckling from my wife. So instead of getting the heckling from my wife, I get it from one of my co-workers – you should read some "real" Christian books. Undaunted, I dive into Save Yourself. Kim Michaels wrote the book in a conversation format. Kim asks a question, Jesus answers. Lots more Ah Ha moments as I read thru it. Also, this feeling or sense that this is true, it is right and everything is going to be Ok. When I finished it, I sat wide-eyed for a long time. Finally, I began to get a grip on what this whole life thing is supposed to be about.

Now I jump right into The Master Keys to the Abundant Life. Kim also writes this one, but it is channeled directly from Mother Mary, the Virgin Mary, Jesus’ mother. This book is 600 pages, so it takes awhile to read, but I couldn’t put it down. Many nights, reading into the wee hours. My wife asking, what time did you come to bed? At the end of the book, Mother Mary suggests a series of Rosaries to help clear out the toxic energies and old beliefs systems from your spirit. I could feel an immediate difference reading these rosaries aloud. Needless to say, the last thing I wanted was my wife to hear me giving rosaries, so I would wait until she wasn’t at the house. I found myself wanting her to leave so I could give a rosary. And sometimes, she would come back early, and I would be upset that I couldn’t finish. Finally, I just decided to say it softly so she couldn’t hear.

Now the strange part. Remember how I had decided that I wouldn’t be able to go to the Retreat in Chicago? No sooner had I finished the Master Keys book that my boss calls me into his office. I have to go to San Jose, California for training on this new planning system. The dates are May 22 to 24. As we are looking at the calendar, I remember that the Retreat is scheduled for May 25. I ask my boss if I can have the 25th and 26th off after the training in California so I can visit "friends" in Chicago. He says, sure no problem. So I book my flight with the return leg pit stopping in Chicago. How cool is that! No way in a million years could I have orchestrated that. I felt like someone must really want me to be there.

I have written about the Retreat elsewhere, so I won’t rehash that. But let me tell you where I am currently. I now understand where that longing to know who I am came from. I now have a much clearer picture of the universe as a whole and what my role is in it. Not only do I know who I am, what I am, but I now know that I have a specific purpose for being here on this Earth at this particular moment in time. Yes, I am still fine-tuning the details of all this, but I hope you can sense my peace and joy. Can you imagine living without despair and hopelessness? Can you imagine an entire world of people living in peace and harmony? Can you imagine living life without once thinking you have to have a drink or take some drug to make you feel better or dull the pain? What if you could feel the unconditional love of God in you and you knew that you were loved no matter what tragic thing you think you did that makes you feel unworthy?

Now, having said that, can you see that this path must be a gradual one? What do you think would happen to people if all of a sudden, they are stripped of their beliefs, their illusion of security? Many would simply go insane. This would also violate the law of free will. Freely, we have chosen these beliefs and illusions. Freely, we must give them up. I hope you can now see that life is a path. You get to decide which path you will take. If you don’t make the actual decision to take a particular path, that decision automatically takes you down another path. You have to decide this day, today, everyday, whom you will serve. Choose the path that leads to life. What is the path to life. Only you can discover that. You have within you already all you need to find that path. Start, as I did, by asking the question, who am I. I promise you, you will get an answer. The key is not to expect it to be what you think it should be. Leave your mind open to the possibility that you are more than what you currently think you are.

Peace and joy be with you on your journey of discovery.

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